Some up to date records for that Christmas quiz (courtesy www.)

 

Association Football: Goals and goalscoring records.

Record	Player	Nationality	Year(s)	Details
Player with most official goals of all time	Cristiano Ronaldo	Portugal	2002–present	Cristiano scored 867 goals in his career.
Player with most club goals	Josef Bican	Austria  Czechoslovakia	1931–1957	Bican scored 781 goals in 493 matches with ten different clubs during his 27-year long career.
Player with most international goals	Cristiano Ronaldo	Portugal	2003–present	128 goals International goals in 205 games.
Player with the most goals scored in a calendar year	Lionel Messi	Argentina	2012	Messi scored 91 goals in 69 matches in 2012 for Barcelona and Argentina
Player with most club-goals scored in a football season	Lionel Messi	Argentina	2011–12	Messi scored 73 goals with Barcelona during the 2011–12 season.
Player with most international goals in a calendar year	Sándor Kocsis	Hungary	1954	Kocsis scored 23 goals in 14 games in 1954 with the Hungary national football team.
Player with most goals scored for a single club	Lionel Messi	Argentina	2004–2021	Messi scored 672 goals for Barcelona during 17 seasons.
Player with most goals scored in an international match	Archie Thompson	Australia	2001	On 11 April 2001, Thompson scored 13 goals, in the Australia 31–0 American Samoa match during the 2002 FIFA World Cup qualification.
Player with most goals scored in a top tier league match	Hacène Lalmas men	Algeria	1962	Scored 14 goals in the match Ruisseau 18–0 Birtouta in 1962–63 Algerian Championnat National.
	Shokhan Salihi women	Iraq	2022	Scored 15 goals with Al-Hilal against Sama in the 2022–23 Saudi Women's Premier League.
Player with most goals scored in any division tier league match	Yanick Manzizila	Democratic Republic of the Congo	2014	Scored 21 goals in the match Kongo United 30–0 Balrog Botkyrka.
Player with most goals scored in a domestic cup match	Stefan Dembicki	France	1942	In the preliminary round of the 1942–43 French Cup, Dembicki scored 16 goals in the RC Lens - Auby Asturies match (32–0).
Player with most penalty kick goals	Cristiano Ronaldo	Portugal	2002–present	Cristiano scored 158 penalties goals.
Player with most free kick goals	Juninho	Brazil	1993–2013	Juninho scored 77 free kicks goals.
Highest goal-scoring goalkeeper of all time	Rogério Ceni	Brazil	1990–2015	Ceni scored 129 goals in 1,236 games.
Youngest international goalscorer	Aung Kyaw Tun	Myanmar	2000	On 6 November 2000, Aung Kyaw Tun scored for Myanmar in the 2000 AFF Championship match against Thailand (3–1 defeat) at 14 years and 93 days.
Oldest international goalscorer	Billy Meredith	Wales	1919	On 11 October 1919, Billy Meredith scored for Wales in the 1919–20 British Home Championship match against England (6–1 win) at 45 years and 73 days.
Longest distance goal scored	Tom King	Wales	2021	On 21 January 2021, goalkeeper King scored from own six-yard box, a distance of 96.01 meters (105 yds) for Newport County in the 1–1 draw with Cheltenham Town, in League Two.